Watch your frickin' mouth!
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Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the oversensitivity brigade is at it again. Now it seems not only are you precluded from the use of foul language, you're not even able to refer to profanity. Case in point comes from Altoona, PA where a convenience store by the name of Sheetz is marketing a brand-new, fried chicken sandwich under the name "Crispy Frickin' Chicken." This little moniker has garnered the ire of citizens and street preachers alike, especially since the store decided to feature their new sandwich, along with its faux-profane nom de guerre, on billboards.
Now that the word "frickin'" (a substitute for the present participle of the nasty, nasty f-word) is splashed all over town assaulting the senses of residents from on high, the city's in an uproar. In nearby Hazel Township one billboard was actually removed following complaints from incensed denizens. According to the Associated Press, "There was a lady who left an angry voice mail," code enforcement officer Fran Calarco said. "And a man called and said he had small children and didn't think they should be exposed to that type of language. I told him I completely understood and agreed."
That type of language? WHAT type of language? Well dang me all to heck, I just don't know what the frick I would do if my kids were ever exposed to that kind of shinola. I'd probably have to take a shovel to the son-of-a-biscuit-eater responsible for it. And the fact that the local constabulary is in agreement with these whiners just defies explanation. Does anybody in Pennsylvania have even a few firing synapses left?
And now the clergy (of sorts) has chimed in. A report from the Lebanon (PA) Daily News reads, in part: Michael Sucec, who described himself as a street preacher, told the supervisors Tuesday night that a billboard advertising Sheetz’s new “Crispy Frickin’ Chicken” sandwich is offensive to him because of the word “frickin,’” which he called a “euphemism for fornication.”
Well if that don't put a gosh-darned point on it, I don't know what will. After all, nothing reminds me of fornication more than chicken sandwich billboards. Next thing you know, kids will be shagging each other in the streets out in front of the KFC.
Can we please, just this once, pretend to be sensible? Nah, probably not.
Oh well...frick it.
Image courtesy: The Lebanon Daily News.
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